Technical Questions with Translations for Liberals

Technical Questions with Translations for Liberals

WHY ARE HOME MOVIES HARD TO SEND BY EMAIL?
CONSERVATIVE ANSWER: Movies are an illusion and are really separate photo images 24 to 30 per second or so, that fool your eyes into thinking the eyes see motion - since our eyes retain images for a brief time. But these images are in fact just still pictures. However, at 24 a second, even just one minute of them would be 24 x 60 = 1440 images or perhaps even 125 megabytes - too much for email.
LIBERAL ANSWER: It is because industry hates you ! We must do away with capitalism ! Now !


WHAT DOES THE ZIMMERMAN VERDICT TELL US?
CONSERVATIVE ANSWER: Well, likely none of us were there, but Hispanic Zimmerman was cleared three times - the first time by the police and then secondarily cleared by the FBI of a hate crime, and then found not guilty by a jury, He and his family have suffered wrongfully enough and should be given back their belongings and their life.
LIBERAL ANSWER: Duh .... Blacks rank higher on the Obama scale than Whites and even Hispanics. He is guilty by race ! True Americans should riot and smash windows and stores !


WHY IS SO LITTLE MONEY COMING INTO THE US THAT WE HAVE A LARGE DEFICIT?
CONSERVATIVE ANSWER: The politicians never allowed businesses to return after the 2008 recession, forcing new regulations on them and more taxes, and then Obamacare instead. And so the loss of businesses and employees in them - which means also high unemployment - mean fewer businesses and people paying taxes and therefore less income into the US Treasury. Basically, with many dead businesses and high unemployment, too few Americans or businesses are paying taxes while unemployment pay and welfare soar.
LIBERAL ANSWER: The rich never pay their fair share since they hate you and hate America! Get em !! They must pay much higher taxes.... now... now !!! My God! Some are still standing !! Hurry !!


WHY IS U.S. EDUCATION THE MOST EXPENSIVE IN THE WORLD AND YET AMERICANS RANK 25th IN MATH?
CONSERVATIVE ANSWER: Hard to tell all of the answers until someone actually investigates this in a fair manner. However, we suspect it is not the hard working great teachers today who are the problem. Places for the investigators to check might include money going to union people or campaign contributions that have little to do with education, or bad practices, or tenure or union rules that allow bad teachers to stay on the payroll, or another place to check might be pensions far higher than in the private sector.
LIBERAL ANSWER: At least the US is still in the top ten !! The problem is that conservatives won't give us more money !!


WHY IS MICHELLE OBAMA TELLING US WHAT TO EAT?
CONSERVATIVE ANSWER: Beats me
LIBERAL ANSWER: She is a million times smarter than the doctors who the great President Obama tells us chops off arms and legs. Before Michelle came along, no one ate right, and people only lived to be 19 years old. Do what she says or die !!!


WHAT SHOULD the U.S. POPULATION CONTROL PLAN BE?
CONSERVATIVE ANSWER: We don't need or want one
LIBERAL ANSWER: We should kill off 3000 babies or so a day, a million a year, in abortion centers. But then to compensate we should let in 30 million illegal immigrants we know nothing about in order to compensate.
CONSERVATIVE Re-DIRECT : Huh ?????

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Comments are closed for this blog post

Comment by Jerseygal on July 21, 2013 at 9:23am

Good ones, RN!  Tweeting it out!

Comment by Robin on August 2, 2013 at 8:54pm

Tweeting this out! Awesome!

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